Granny

As usual, I was dressed and ready to go before Joe found his underwear.

It's a constant source of amazement to me that anybody can take as long as he does to get dressed. And granny it's not like he primps or anything; the best way I can describe it is... he gets distracted.

He'll start to brush his teeth, then suddenly remember he needs to phone somebody. He'll go make the call and while he's there, he'll see the plant on the phone stand needs granny watering. He gets the watering can and as he's filling it at the sink, he realizes he forgot to tell me about the appointment he made for the boat to go in for repairs.

At that point, he'll wander into the bedroom with the watering can in one hand and the phone in the other, a towel the only thing keeping him from being one granny with nature.

That's my cue to start bitching.

So it's me that ends up watering the plant and hanging up the phone, while granny Joe jumps into the clothes I've already laid out for him - only because I'm wise to his tricks. I don't want a repeat of the time I left him alone to dress, only to find him sitting on the floor by the closet, nude, and sorting his collection of baseball cards, when we were already five minutes late for a dinner with one of my clients.

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